Domestic abuse can be perpetrated by any gender against another gender or against a same sex partner. I work only with women who are victims/survivors of domestic violence and as such this work depicts the abuse from a women’s viewpoint. At the root of domestic abuse is a desire for the abuser to have power and control over their partner. In most situations, the abuser uses a range of manipulative behaviours to gradually gain control over the partner. By grooming her he eventually ‘gets inside her head’ and manages to replace her thoughts and feelings with his own so that she loses her sense of self. The more successful he is at getting her to internalize his voice, the more control he has over her. In this video we hear the woman repeating in her head the abusive language the partner uses. At this stage she has internalized these negative beliefs about herself and believes herself to be this worthless, ugly person he wants her to believe she is.

With this work I wanted to give these women a voice as they are often silenced, not only by the perpetrator but often by a society who doesn’t want to get involved, who often doesn’t believe the woman and who often believes the abuse is the woman’s own fault and that she chooses to stay in the relationship. The truth is, however, far more complicated than that as it is incredibly difficult to leave when one’s sense of self has been annihilated.

https://vimeo.com/451333458 - Please click on this link to watch he loves me he loves me not